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I’m Spendin’ Nuttin’ for Christmas: Kiddie Gift Ideas on the Cheap

15 Dec

Of the many many prestigious titles I hold (Domestic Macgyver, Queen of Sanford 2000, Person Who Knows a Surprisingly Large Amount of Information about B-List Actors), the one I’m most proud of is Favorite Aunt. Duties of Favorite Aunt include: rubbing your favored-ness in other aunt’s faces, keeping on top of Sponge Bob trivia, and providing awesome holiday gifts, the last of which, I’m going to discuss today.

Walking through the toy aisle during this time of year, it’s easy to fill your cart with big-faced dolls, computer games, and various movie-themed Lego sets. The problem is filling your wallet with the money to walk out of the store without getting tackled by a plain-clothed security card.

A girl can’t defer the student loan bill in the name of Bratz dolls. And she can’t spend Christmas hand-cuffed in the Target security office either. That’s why I’ve thought of some cheap but very thoughtful gift ideas for the little rugrats over the years. The following kiddie gifts are kid-tested and Favorite Aunt approved.  Because I have 9 nieces and nephews and another one on the way, I’ve given ya’ll 10 ideas:

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Oops, I Card-ed.

13 Nov

November is a big month for the fam. Thanksgiving, Mom & Dad’s anniversary, and three birthdays, one of which is MINE. I could drop $18 at Walgreens in the talking card section (and don’t get me wrong, I love me some Hoops & Yo Yo), but I’ve got paper and glue and scissors right here in my apartment. So I’m going to take the higher road to expressing my sentiments on paper, and spend my thought and time instead of my money. Suck it Hallmark.

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All A-Board Game: Arts & Scraps Pirate Bounty

27 Oct

I know that I’ve missed Talk Like A Pirate Day so stop your lily-livered yappin. Me thinks any day is sufficient for celebratin’ pirates.

I was inspired to make a pirate-themed gift for me land-lubbin’ mateys (the scally wags…) when I docked at the landlocked little gem of Detroit, Arts & Scraps.

Arts & Scraps is a hearty organization that takes donated recycled materials and uses them to help kids and grown-ups alike “think, create, and learn”. They make kits out of their scraps that kids can use to make wonderful art. They also throw birthday parties, hang student art up in their gallery, host field trips, AND have an entire fabric room stuffed to the gills with fabric. Well, shiver me timbers!!!!

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Paper Bag Writer: TV Lunches

16 Sep

When I was wee, I usually spent my early autumn evenings getting kicked out of the various rooms in my home for various annoying-little-sister atrocities like singing, whining, “I’m telling”, etc. I’d be exiled from both bedrooms where my three older sisters were practicing their marching band instruments, talking on the phone, or dying each other’s hair. Banned from the back porch where my brother constructed intricate Lego metropolises. And shooed out of the dining room so that my father could pay bills without being serenaded with a Patti LaBelle medley or a scene from Gypsy (because it’s weird to have your daughter sing to you in the voice of a vaudeville stripper).

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Summer Fun for a Song (and by song I mean movie title)

26 Aug

Note:  Do you usually only get through the first paragraph of my rant before you move on to Awkward Family Photos? Stick with it til the end this time and find out how to win a Thriftfulness prize (don’t just scroll, I’ll know)!

Besides the thighs on hot vinyl conundrum (sticky thighs…it ain’t a bbq recipe), I love summer. The smell of the inside of tents, wild flowers and charred hot dogs. Bare and filthy feet. Icee pops by the bulk section boxload. And the best part about summer is that it’s free to be outside! There are so many fun things to do that don’t cost a chunk of hot sweaty change. And we’ve got to get our Summer Fun in while the gettin’ is good!  We don’t have much longer before it’s time to unpack the thick socks again.

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This One’s for the Doggy Paddlers: Craft Hall Gifts

12 Aug

This post is dedicated to all the boys I gave my craft hall jewelry and 4-H nametags to.

I can’t swim. I can’t jump rope either. And it took me a whole summer to learn how to somersault (I just like my neck and head where they are, thankyouverymuch). I feel comfortable saying that now because as a child, I tried saying everything else to get me out of those activities: Practicing gymnastics in the backyard? Think I’ll head on home. Somersaulting is so 1990. Jump Rope for Heart Day? None for me thanks, I’m having heart palpitations. And I have a loose tooth. And I think I just had my period for the first time…again.

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S is for Hobo

29 Jul

S is for summer. For Sno-Cones and sandy beaches, sunny afternoons, Sting, and a sh#% ton of weddings, birthday parties, and reunions to attend. This time of year can fill up fast. It’s a particularly packed schedule for those of us in the Midwest who are trying to cram all of our outdoor social events into the Non-Snow months.

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First Anniversary of Thriftfulness!: Sweet Yes Tea Party

14 Apr

Note: Today, my blog is one year old. Happy birthday blog. I made you some springtime sweets. Thanks readers for continuing to read.

When I was a young’n, one of my favorite things to play outside was “Feed the President” with my cousins. I guess we chose him because he was the most important person we could think of, although we might not have actually known who “The President” was. We would walk down to my Grandma and Grandpa’s house and Grandma would give us empty butter tubs and jam jars to prepare our “meals” in. It was always a decadent multi-course affair: grass salad, ditch-water soup, pinecones wrapped in dirty empty candy-wrappers that we found in the woods. We had dead leaves for plates, twigs for silverware, but dessert was the best part because sometimes for dessert, Grandma would make actual food! Blueberries and milk with sugar were my favorite, so tasty that we ate Mr. President’s helping too…

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Armchair Spring Break: Putting the S back in Scrap-Crafts

23 Mar

This year, what happens on spring break stays on my couch. Because that’s where I’ll be. Without so much as the cable television to watch others enjoying themselves on vacay. I’m resourceful, but not resourceful enough to come up with Cabo cash. Or Vegas cash. Or even Delaware cash. What I can do is camp out in my Bermuda shorts with a microwaved hot dog and a pile of junk and daydream about the next time I get out of Dodge.

Which is how I came up with the little gifty I made for my summer road-trip buddy: a little pre-road trip preparation. While organizing my collage materials (Thrifty New Year’s Resolution. Check.) into categories such as Buildings and Objects, Animals and People, Retro, and Nature-y, I decided to create a clipboard for my Road-Trip Skipper so that we would have a place to keep all our important road trip documents…should we scare up the money to go on another road trip.

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A Future So Bright: Little Golden Lamp

13 Mar

This post is dedicated to all my lovely nieces and nephews, including Baby Still-In-The-Oven. I love you very much. Love, Your Favorite Aunt who dedicates posts to you and makes thoughtful homemade gifts and is the coolest and funniest and who will probably help you get away with something your parents wouldn’t approve of when you’re older… Favorite. Me. Tops.

As all the aunts and uncles out there know, the role of Favorite Relative is a coveted one. It takes a serious and complicated combination of charm, candy, and guilt to secure the spot.

In my  family, Favorite Aunt is a constant crusade and I’ll be the first to admit it can get dirty. I’ve secretly cut bigger slices of birthday cake, started whisper-campaigns about my sisters being “stinky” or “ucky”, and read bedtime stories until my mouth was so parched I could barely eek out the words: “Now…who’s …your…favorite?”

Nary a holiday has gone by without a niece of nephew stuck in a dining room chair, eyes darting from face to face to face to face to face while we each remind him or her how wonderful we are. Will their loyalties hold? Will they remember the pop bottle rocket you made with them last summer when they’re holding this spring’s sidewalk chalk in their grimy little hands? How quickly they forget. Oh, how quickly they forget.

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